Bookings are open for Jungian natal chart readings and tarot readings!!!!
Ever since I arrived on the scene in the eclipse season of ’85, I’ve thrived in the depths and gasped for air in the shallow end. I quite literally was born without air in my lungs and almost didn’t make it as a baby human. Hey, Pluto.
For the many years before I ran into Jungian astrology, my emotionality, passion, creativity, sensitivity, intensity and need for true emotional intimacy were shunned by both others and myself. Once upon a time, I tried to fit into friendships, relationships, jobs and lifestyles that couldn’t enjoy the real me. I spent a lot of time daydreaming about a life where I was free to be myself without being made to feel both too much and not enough. Friends criticized me for “sounding like I was in a movie” when I spoke while partners complained that emotional intimacy was a luxury they shouldn’t have to afford.
Jobs couldn’t hold my attention due to the internal screaming happening in my mind. Variations of, “I AM SO BORED OH MY GOD PLEASE SEND ME ON AN ERRAND ANYTHING AT ALL BUT THIS OFFICE,” plagued my every moment on the clock. The list goes on. The truth was I hadn’t begun enjoying being me enough to protect myself and find my people.
After getting my first natal chart reading, I entered the realm of Jungian astrology and was absolutely shocked by the way my chart languaged what I had always considered ineffable and just outside my reach. I knew I was an outcast who folks seemed to want on their team, but I didn’t know why I felt like such an alien amongst even my like-minded peers. I began to understand the map that would eventually lead me to the parts of myself that demanded my deeper attention and reverence. Through understanding my astrology, I got to experience the gifts that waited for me including my own erotic nature, creativity, vitality, and my desire to speak the truthiest truth I can find, see a poet’s dictionary. I am forever thankful to the unbelievably specific psychological analysis that Jungian astrology affords.
I saw that Uranus, the planet of rebellion and freedom, was in my second house of resources and talents. And, that all of my 5 Scorpio placements were in the first house of being myself. That I was born at the exact degree of Pluto during Scorpio Eclipse Season as a Scorpio Sun was remedied, seemingly at the last minute, by a gift from the cosmos: the last cancer moon just before the total solar eclipse in November of 1985. I saw I was a triple water sign with a fire Mercury. That Venus and Mars were in my 12th, in Libra. I understood why I almost died at birth and why I was two weeks late. I understood why I was born cross-eyed. Why I still don’t see in 3D. Why I see another dimension altogether. And every day, I am still understanding.
It’s no wonder I was screaming inside. I had shadowed my Scorpionic and Sagittarian fire by being in friendships and environments not suited for me and it was burning me up. My own Uranian impulses were NOT having it.
I couldn’t find a reflection of myself in the world nor my friends nor partners until I looked into my natal chart and saw myself in the clearest mirror I believe we have access to, outside of our dreams, creativity and psychedelics (when not used to spiritually bypass psychological inner work).
As a Plutonic person born in a season of letting go of said identity (south node conjunct my sun), I began to piece together the reason I was so polarizing to folks. I understood that those who were made of the same stuff as me would be magnetized to me while others who felt I was too taboo would be repelled. Fine by me now that I knew why—my presence and values are ruled by an intensity most only experience in a theater or peak experiences. People have often been frustrated with me for maintaining a wildly present interest in being fully alive. For being “unbridled.”
My natal chart helped me to stop internalizing the shame that would ultimately come my way from those who felt repelled or worse, those who engaged in power struggles with me once they saw my audacity to simply be myself. I once dated someone who said, “It’s just that you’re so sure of yourself! It’s intimidating!” Listen, I have Pluto in the first house conjunct my ascendant exactly. I can’t be anything but sincerely me without dissociating. I’m not doing that. No one should have to do that.
Dear reader, please leave alone those who find your empowerment threatening. We are all powerful but those whose power is unconscious will always find issue with yours. They believe that since you have it and are comfortable in it, they don’t have it and can’t be comfortable in it. They will try to take it from you in small and big ways in a misguided effort to feel powerful.
My bookshop, A Poet’s Choices, has been an effort to stay self-employed and create my own bookish world as I worked on my astrology and art business while avoiding the mundanity of an office job where I’d make basic mistakes not because I was incapable but because I could not pay attention past the absolutely annihilating boredom infiltrating my mind. (I have other reasons for avoiding the 9-5 that are more private that I won’t share but needless to say, it isn’t for me.)
The bookshop was always supposed to be my version of a 9-5 while I tended to my deeper creative talents and started using those skills for work. Then, the pandemic. Everything changed including the way I sourced inventory. At the same time, my eye condition started resulting in double vision so driving on the freeway became impossible. Survival mode kicked in and has been wrangling my efforts like quicksand ever since.
My own desire to do what I’m truly meant for became shadowed in a new way until, finally, I decided to start soft moon rising during my south node return last year, a once in 18-year transit. And then, Venus Rx in Leo came for my midheaven and she said, “YOU LET YOURSELF BURN, AGAIN, AND FOR THE LAST TIME.” I knew I didn’t have time outside of the hustle I was swallowed up by but I also knew that Venus came for my throat and showed me what I had let fall into my shadow in a way I could no longer kick down the road. Who would I be if I didn’t go down there and get myself? So, I did.
Ever since, I have been slowly transitioning away from the bookstore into writing, art, and astrology. Namely, why I’m here. But now, it’s time to make a full transition and to start running the bookshop as a hobby. I’ve tucked myself away in the daily grind for too long. Bookings are now open for March. You can get a natal chart reading with me here. Scroll down to read about my more formal qualifications if you’re into that sort of thing. Expect prints of my art for sale next month and essays, a poet’s dictionary, poetry and other creative pursuits in your inbox more often. Consider being a paid subscriber. Your $6/month makes a big difference in my world and allows me to spend more time here without worrying.
My best work is in exploring uncharted territories with myself and other seekers and coming up to the surface with alchemical gold. Astrology readings with me are catalysts for change that isn’t imposed on you from the outside. I help you let yourself become what you most want to be through the delicate intricacies of who exactly it is that you are. This reading will help you with the psychic integration needed to live wholeheartedly and sustainably in a life that truly excites you. Your desires are budding parts of your identity. This I have learned through being ruled by Eros, or Pluto.
As someone who goes into the depths, I can’t do several readings a day so if this is something you’d like to do, please know that I have limited availability and will start a waitlist for April for folks who want a reading after I’m fully booked. There is something for everyone and soon, there will be follow up sessions for the lovely souls who have already had their natal chart read by me.
Whether you’d like to get a reading or not, if you feel ill at ease with current conditions in your life, please know there is a trustworthy map that leads you to the place you wish you could live. You were born worthy of this place, as evidenced by the universe itself. You are a unique face of existence made manifest to be exactly who it is that you are. Reality yearns to live through you, as you.
Sometimes, we find home and have to leave again for a time. Other times, we get to stay. This is me staying. I hope you’ll come inside and join me.
Love you,
Nairy
The formal stuff: I have a Bachelor’s in Psychology and three and a half years of clinical psychology training. I’ve studied in MISPA’s two psychological astrology programs and have 20 years of experience working with folks in various mental health settings, in my one-on-one writing workshops, astrology readings and tarot readings.
P.S. For the love of anything at all, does anyone know how to make it to where the text in a product listing on SquareSpace wraps around the photo in the listing? Thank you. xx